I’ve always been private about my personal life and rarely talk about it. However, writing this blog has unexpectedly become a therapeutic outlet for me. It’s been a journey of confession, sharing the struggles that have shaped me into who I am today. After 40-something years, I can honestly say I like myself and the direction my life is heading. Initially, I never intended to get this personal in my writing. Yet, to truly convey how I rely on and trust the Lord, sharing my experiences seems essential.
This time of year has always been particularly tough for me. High anxiety grips me, and I find myself wanting to retreat from everyone – the exact opposite of what Thanksgiving embodies. Instead of embracing a time of thankfulness and reflection on our blessings, I was mired in self-doubt and self-pity. But a few years ago, something shifted within me. I can’t pinpoint exactly what it was, but I’ve moved to a place of self-forgiveness and grace.
For a long time, expressing gratitude and joy felt impossible when hope seemed like a distant dream. I was blinded by my own shortcomings, unable to recognize any redeeming qualities in myself. So, what changed? The key was learning to forgive myself, a concept that initially seemed foreign and unfathomable. Through Christ, I witnessed others forgiving me – an act I couldn’t grasp coming from man or God. Yet, it was real. The warmth of Christ’s forgiveness enveloped me, and with it came the daunting task of learning to trust. Not just trusting others, but for the first time, trusting in my worth and believing in a loving God who has a plan for my happiness.
Peter’s life was rife with trials and opposition, yet he consistently turned to the Lord. His epistles provide guidance on living a life of trust. For instance, he challenges us to “Rejoice in your various trials” (1 Peter 1:6). He advises us not to be startled by them, to remain humble, and to cast all our anxieties onto God. He explains why this approach is vital. For example, rejoicing in trials is about understanding that they test and refine our faith, producing patience and trust in God. This faith, “more precious than gold,” is purified by fire and leads to praise, glory, and honor at the revelation of Jesus Christ. Peter teaches us to trust in God’s plan, even in suffering, assuring us that as we humble ourselves before God, He will exalt us in due time. God cares for His people, and His plan for us is one of hope and elevation.
So where did I start? And how can I “Rejoice in (my) various trials”? Trusting in God and others is a journey, not a destination. The first piece of advice I would give is to be patient with yourself. I certainly didn’t wake up one day as a perfect man – far from it. I still face trials and struggles, but now, instead of succumbing to discouragement, I try to forgive myself, learn from each trial, and move on without dwelling on them.
I began with regular, purposeful prayer. I hadn’t always been honest with God, mistakenly thinking I could hide from Him. But as I started picturing Him as a friend and opened up about my struggles, fears, and doubts, I found personal strength. As I sought guidance, I began to recognize answers and the hand of the Lord in my life.
The Old Testament taught me that the Lord works miracles with imperfect people. He seeks willingness to serve and our best efforts. My study of the Doctrine and Covenants showed me people who struggled like me and how willing the Lord was to bless their lives amidst trials. I can finally say I love the New Testament. To see who Christ was as a man, to follow his apostles and disciples to learn about Paul had his love for the savior and the Book of Mormon offer countless examples of faithful individuals trusting in the Lord. Their stories have taught me that as we turn to Him, we can lead rewarding and blessed lives. Study the scriptures; it’s never too late to learn from those who placed their trust in something beyond themselves.
Be open to personal revelation in the form of thoughts, feelings, insights, or inspiration during your day. Recognizing and trusting these impressions is a significant step in trusting God.
Put God to the test with small acts of faith. Look for opportunities to recognize the Lord’s hand in your life and embrace it when it happens. These acts of faith, no matter how small, can build your confidence in God’s guidance.
Actively participate in your church community. You can witness others exercising their faith and trust in the Lord, and observe the blessings He provides. Share your struggles with like-minded people who may have experienced similar challenges. Partaking of the sacrament each week renews the promise that God will be present in your life as you walk in His.
Keeping a journal has been immensely helpful for me. It allows you to document your dealings with the Lord and to reflect on the goodness in your life. Over time, this record will show you how far you have come and how God has answered your prayers and guided you.
Make it a habit to recognize and appreciate the blessings in your life. Acknowledging God’s hand in your daily life can deepen your sense of His presence and love.
Trusting in God’s Plan!
As I reflect on my journey, I realize that the path to trusting God was not a straight line. It involved many turns, ups and downs, and moments of profound realization. The transformation from a state of self-doubt and anxiety to one of self-forgiveness and grace wasn’t immediate or easy. It is a process, a journey of learning to trust not just in God, but also in myself.
Through prayer, scripture study, and seeking personal revelation, I found strength I didn’t know I had. I learned that God uses our imperfections, our struggles, and even our failures to shape us into who we are meant to be. My experiences during Thanksgiving, a time that once brought me anxiety, now bring opportunities for gratitude and reflection on the blessings in my life, no matter how small they may seem.
Peter’s teachings and the examples of faith in the scriptures have shown me that trials are not just obstacles but are essential to our spiritual growth. They teach us patience, resilience, and most importantly, trust in God’s plan.
To those of you on a similar path, seeking to find trust in God amid your trials, remember this: The journey is as important as the destination. Each step, no matter how small, is a step towards a deeper understanding and relationship with God. Be patient with yourself, embrace your journey, and keep your heart open to the lessons God is teaching you along the way.
May we all find the courage to trust God in our trials, to see our struggles through the lens of faith, and to embrace the transformative power of His grace in our lives.
Living the Good News 